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Can You Meet my High Standards?
Online: 2539 days ago   Updated: 2542 days ago   Joined: 2542 days ago
The Basics
  Age: 69   Gender: Male   Race: Caucasian   Location: Elgin Arizona United States
The Details
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About Me

I’m 6 feet tall, brown hair (still have all of it), green eyes and a neatly trimmed beard. I don’t have any tattoos or piercing and have all of my own teeth.
I was raised in the country and respect the simple life and old fashioned values. I am a gentleman and I open doors for women.
Honesty and trust are important to me. After all, what do you have without those qualities?
I believe in accountability, accomplishments and I believe in the merit system. I have a good sense of humor and voted in the last election to prove it.
You won’t find me watching too many spectator sports or TV shows which rely upon canned laughter. I like watching nature films, the Discovery channel, and outdoor programs. I enjoy science fiction, especially State of the Union Addresses from the White House.

I live in the country and enjoy the peaceful country lifestyle. I like to the watch deer in my yard almost every day and some of the spectacular sunsets we have. I share my home with two wonderful dogs and two loving but ungrateful cats.

I enjoy the outdoors, animals, campfires, riding ATV’s, fishing, thunderstorms, swap meets, target shooting, comedy, a good movie and quiet times with friends.
I enjoy a variety of music including easy listening, jazz, blues and classical. When it comes to rap or whiny old country and western, you might say I have Van Gogh’s ear for music.

I don’t smoke and really don’t care to be around smokers. I occasionally drink socially but not to excess. At least that’s always the intent. . . . . .
Waking up naked on the hood of my truck with the keys in my butt is no fun.

I recently retired at 62 and am looking for a friend to enjoy the above activities with me.

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What I'm Looking For

I would like to meet a female friend with opposable thumbs who is a non-smoker. Preferably a lady who has been blessed with a good sense of humor and a bit of common sense.

Our first date can be for coffee, lunch, a drink or whatever you feel most comfortable with. I’m flexible.
I do, however, have a few restrictions. If any of the following apply to you, it may prove to be an issue:

1. If you have a room temperature IQ and facial tattoos.

2. If you are looking for a sugar daddy to put your fourteen children through medical school.

3. If you maintain a blood alcohol level higher than your last grade point average.

4. If the Betty Ford clinic has named a syndrome after you.

5. If you make regular appearances on the Cops TV show but you are not in law enforcement.

6. If your last six dates have ended with restraining orders.

7. If you receive more than a dozen notices from collection agencies each week.

8. If you wear a court ordered ankle bracelet.

9. If you have ever partied with Charlie Sheen.

10. If your occupation involves dollar bills in your waistband.

Please deduct 10 points for each yes answer.

Now I realize I’ve set the bar pretty high but if you have been able to satisfy the stringent requirements listed above, you may indeed be the exceptional person I am seeking. If your parole officer will allow you to date, please send me an email. I would like to correspond with you.

Your photo will get you more of mine. That way we can have a face to associate with the words we exchange.
Please, no inappropriate pics unless you have something highly unusual. In that event, I will be glad to put you in touch with my friend who is with the circus.

I appreciate the time you’ve spent reading this and I hope you enjoyed my feeble attempt at humor.
I will respond to all email.
Thank you and have a great day.


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